An astrology system developed in an age before the science existed to truly understand the Universe and the huge number of Galaxies that existed, the black hole that is in the center of our Galaxy, our nearest Star, and all the outer planets is going to be very limited in its effectiveness. It will work to quite a degree due to the power of belief and so much leeway in interpretation due to so many ways of interpreting it. We tend to get stuck in the past on this spiritually backward planet and stuck on mythology that is not backed up enough by how effective it works.
I was born neurologically different with limited visual memory and finer motor skills. A lot of people are born neurologically different with some more “unique” than others, and often their talents are wasted on a planet that gets too much into an overly simplistic one size fits all approach toward its inhabitants with “locked in religious/spiritual beliefs and modern science adding to this. Ego plays a strong role in keeping most people from doing the really hard work required to advance in their spiritual sensitivity toward themselves and others especially those who do not fit in very well! A lot of “genius” is thus wasted on this planet. A mythology around the word “genius” has developed that limits the number of people who can fit into this category and making it a category people tend to be afraid to strive for.
Early in my life I became very heavily dependent on my spirit and the spiritual to guide me and lost a lot of my trust in others in this world to be that helpful to me in times of crisis in my life. Although people have tended to help me with out me asking. I lost a lot of my faith in the level of expertise existing on this planet due to how inept these experts were in understanding the very intense situation I was facing in my life adjusting to a world that was so insensitive to those with the limitations and special abilities people who are “neurologically different” or “differenty abled” often possess.
My focus on dependence on myself spiritually even led to me not even letting someone know(who saw the tears in my eyes) that I didn’t have enough money for a bus to get home from High School in Manchester NH to end of the bus line in Goffstown NH. My mother I though was suppose to pick me up, but didn’t! So I took the Bus using what money I had, but did not pay the rest of the money when due upon getting off the bus. The bus driver probably was affected by the spiritual state I was in so did not appear to notice my not paying.
I developed an interest in the occult and various alternative views of the spiritual at an early age and stopped attending Catholic Church in my early teens. I did still go to a Catholic High School even though I was no longer a believer. I never really was that strong a believe when younger because of some my early experiences with the Church that let me know they did not have their act together spiritually enough to treat me well enough.
I first started with more traditional Astrology, reading a bunch of charts starting around 1976(born Oct 1951). I quickly became creative and experimented with many variations still holding on to the traditional. My intuition helped me a lot in my readings, but I felt I relied to much on my intuition to correct the inadequacies of the astrology system I was using. In the later part 1992 after years of playing with some components of the traditional astrology system and experimenting with new meditative walking and other techniques I had developed, I tried to connect with the media and reach them with my spiritual ideas and also affect the politics of this election year. The pressure of doing this(with the negative spiritual reactions that cam back my way) was too much for me physically/emotionally resulting in my heart rhythm messing up. I had that happen before as a result of the extreme exercises I would do in running and walking swinging heavy dumbbell hand weights. I used meditative breathing to take care of that heart rhythm problem which worked well at the times required. But, when I tried it under the stress in I faced in late 1992, I had to keep doing it continuously and could not stop in order to sleep. When I finally fell asleep when extremely sleep deprived while still fighting to keep up the meditative breathing, I had a near death experience which required all the effort I could muster to come back from. I have a blog on this experience. This experience and the psychological/spiritual states it put me in led to me reevaluating all of my spiritual beliefs and to take a completely fresh approach to m astrology system, and no longer trusting any of the mythology based ideas I still had programmed into me. I became an awful lot more logic based(rational) in my spiritual approach from then on.
